The Onion (which operates "StarWipe") for the win once again:
Kylie Jenner is, again of course, the daughter of Kris Jenner—the widow of O.J.’s late attorney who remarried Olympic athlete Bruce Jenner (now Caitlyn Jenner)—and thus the half-sister to Rob Kardashian. Again, we know all of this, despite any pretense to resistance. This is forcibly ingrained in our culture, along with the perception that this family’s messily intertwined lives constitute compelling drama. At this website, we wake up every morning and pore over it, looking for new, incredibly incremental information to share with you about it.
Fake news gets all the outrage these days, and probably rightfully so. But I'd also argue that bullshit news is damaging our society. Not "bullshit" in that it's fake, but "bullshit" in that it's a complete and utter waste of time and brain cells. People try to chalk this up to "entertainment" but let's be honest, it's bullshit. People are reading news about people who are famous not for any discernible skill or talent other than being famous.
What the fuck are we doing? What even is this? How much longer can we possibly unpack this Matryoshka nesting doll family until we realize that there’s nothing inside but more pretty, empty figures we don’t remember buying to display on our collective cultural mantle, for reasons we can no longer recall?